If you are a woman and find yourself attending a funeral in Šibenik, be careful where you stand.
The newly-published regulations on the behaviour during funerals at the Šibenik town cemetery Kvanj have drawn a storm of criticism. While most suggestions seem reasonable, the most controversial part is the one about the role of women during funerals, reports sibenik.in on October 1, 2017.
The five-point regulations, signed by the director of the local municipal company Joško Vuković, first describe how you should be dressed for funerals. “In urban areas, black clothing is no longer obligatory for funerals and is expected only from the inner circle of the family members of the deceased. However, fluttering and provocative clothing is not appropriate in the situation. Avoid shorts and skirts, sports shirts, and similar wardrobe because a funeral is traditionally a ceremonial event and you should not undermine it with your styling. Respect for the deceased will be demonstrated by your behaviour, which includes the selection of clothing,” say the regulations.
Each funeral is a special occasion because a special person is being laid to rest, and in our culture, it is filled with seriousness and sorrow for the deceased, continues the rulebook.
“You should treat differences with respect and without looking surprised. Come at least 15 minutes prior to the scheduled time to express condolences to the family in the morgue before the funeral ceremony begins. You should also respect the order during the funeral procession, as defined by the priest or the leader of the service. In this region, the order is usually as follows: the cross, men, wreaths, priest, deceased, family members and then women.”
This part of the regulations has caused dissatisfaction among citizens who believe that women are being belittled. “Of course, we did not indent to belittle or degrade women. We have not drafted these regulations as a list of commands, but just a series of suggestions how to behave appropriately during funerals. The part about women is a tradition which, just like in many other cases, very few people nowadays respect. People come to funerals in shirts, in light or white clothing, they smoke, put their feet on the walls, and we just wanted to suggest how they should behave during the funeral, in addition to the traditional rules which have been existed here for hundreds of years,” explained Vuković.
It is a traditional rule for women to walk at the end of the procession, he said. “I did not invent that. This is the order according to the church customs, and it is prescribed by the Church. I do not want to change the tradition. Nevertheless, in the town today, almost no one respects that, and it is complicated to form such a procession, although the custom still lives in the villages, in about 90 percent of cases,” said Vuković.
Translated from sibenik.in.
